Album, Single and EP Reviews



  The Plimptons are Cynical and Bloated by The Plimptons

The Plimptons are Cynical and Bloated cover art

Artist: The Plimptons
Title: The Plimptons are Cynical and Bloated
Catalogue Number: No catalogue number
Review Format: CD
Release Year: 2012

Does your head hurt, my dear? Do you need some paracetamol to handle the pain of listening to all those up their own arse Frightened Rabbit clones? Admittedly, only a deranged doctor (maybe one called Frankenstein?) would actually prescribe The Plimptons as a solution to any real ailment and, yet, this band could well be the cure for musical mediocrity.

It is abundantly obvious that The Plimptons could outdrink, outdance and outfight your average Glasgow band, even the “ classic” rock bands that seem to thrive on Miller Lite (even Christians won’t drink that!) and personal hygiene problems. Back to Plimptons land for in no less than fourteen rounds with their Britpop influences, these twisted funsters demonstrate both a manic sense of humour and a remarkable inability to trip themselves up. The relentlessly jaunty “What Am I Gonna Do Tonight?” stands tall as a perfect pastiche of the miserable bedsit troubadour translated into, of all things, a Blur meets fifties doo wop style with a well deserved car crash ending. You can’t help but smile to the flagrant disregard for the vagaries of fashion shown in “Britpop Girl”. Other bands would have fallen foul of sell importance sarcasm but not The Plimptons. Instead, they counterpoint the song lyrically with the next one. “Pride Comes Before A Fall”. It’s just like they fiendishly planned it!

I’m sure there was something else that I was going to write. I’m sure there was…oh God! I have become a victim to Plimpton’s mind control.  I’m listening rather than writing. How can this be? My new anthem is “Never Going Back to Work”. There’s a voice in my head. It is saying “The Plimptons are writing a musical about Cheryl Cole’s wondrously selfless life and it will be called Cheryl Cole is Neither Cynical nor Bloated because She Eats Macrobiotic Yoghurt”.
This culturally important album is available from Bandcamp.
Review Date: December 30 2012